I have learned over the years how essential gentleness towards oneself is. When you are having a bad moment, bad day, bad year, or a seemingly bad life you owe it to yourself to be kind, to be patient, and to be loving.
Beating yourself up over mistakes of the past or present doesn’t help you in anyway to do better. It’s an act of abuse against yourself, and it will only make you hurt more.
Don’t break apart your own soul. Don’t crush your heart into pieces. Please don’t destroy yourself from the inside out. Be gentle with yourself every single second of every moment of every single day. You are learning, you are growing — you will fumble and stumble but I know you can and will rise again.
You are worthy of your own attention, care, and forgiveness. If you’ve been treating yourself badly today I really hope that you’ll take this opportunity to no longer speak hate into your life but rather love, hope, healing, and joy.
You are not a bad person.
You are not a failure.
You are not meaningless.
You are not born to suffer.
You are not fated for misery.
You are a precious human being. Sweetheart, YOU ARE A PRECIOUS HUMAN BEING. A bad moment doesn’t change that. A mistake doesn’t undo your worth. You are a magnificent treasure, and I hope that today you would begin the process of restoring your soul.I needed this today. Maybe one of you need this too."
With a whole lot of love,
And I’m so happy that my you are significant with or without a significant other mantra was valuable to him. That’s kind of one of my things—one of the things I love to tell people. A couple other things I love to tell people: go to counseling, make your own salad dressing, just about anyone can run a marathon. But I digress.
I love to tell people that it’s okay to be single because so many of my very favorite people are single. And it breaks my heart when they feel like they’re less or half or waiting around for their real lives to start. That’s garbage.
You are significant with or without a significant other. Marriage isn’t like being named prom queen. It’s a partnership, one I love being a part of. But it doesn’t make me more special. It’s not a status symbol."
Here’s the truth: some of the worst people I know are married. I don’t know how it happens. And some of the truly best people I know are single. I don’t know how that happens, either.
But what I do know is it’s not about the fundamental value of the person in question. Your value is not up for grabs, and certainly your value is not riding on a cultural obsession with romance and tulle and diamonds.